Attitudes towards family and marriage have changed dramatically in recent decades. More and more young people do not want to get married, preferring cohabitation, or do not want to have a serious relationship at all.
Why is this the case?
Bachelor life has its pros and cons. And now a great many young men are inclined to believe that the good things in it are still greater. Various reasons are pushing them towards this decision.
Let’s look at the most common ones.
Unwillingness to make choices and take responsibility
In the age of the Internet, getting to know a girl has become much easier. Social networks allow you to communicate simultaneously with dozens of beauties and not everyone can take and choose among them the most worthy. It seems that they should not rush, because at any moment an even better option can arise. The current generation has difficulties with the choice in general. Many people at 30 still haven’t made up their minds about their profession. After all, it is immediately associated with children, credit and a permanent home. Freedom-loving young people do not want to take on that responsibility and say goodbye to freedom.
The stereotype that every girl wants to get married more than anything else in the world still lives in our society. But in reality, there are fewer and fewer such ladies. They earn their own money and don’t want to have children, so they don’t see the point in getting married either. And those who are looking for a potential bridegroom put forth the corresponding requirements. Being slightly prettier than a monkey is no longer enough. A modern man must look after himself, be cultured, well-rounded and self-sufficient. Not everyone wants and can meet these criteria, and therefore find a decent bride does not always work.
Perfect profiles of popular bloggers and sportsmen-apollons can both motivate and generate a lot of unnecessary complexes in the heads of quite attractive guys. And if there are any flaws in appearance, it’s a disaster. It’s hard to believe in your attractiveness when the standards of beauty and success have skyrocketed. Low self-esteem leads to the fact that men are afraid to even talk to the girl he likes, not to mention asking her out. Understandably, he doesn’t even think about marriage.
Fear of divorce
During the rigid patriarchy, women had no rights or property. Back then, husbands could afford many things without fear of divorce. This was because it almost never came to pass, and if there was a divorce, the woman lost out. Things are a little different nowadays with equal rights and prenuptial agreements. One minor mistake can lead to a high-profile divorce, which ends with the man losing half his assets and custody of the children. That is why already on the first date he imagines with horror the possible lawsuits and prefers not to get married in order to avoid them.
A certain lifestyle
If a person lives a long time alone, he acquires habits and preferences, which he does not want to give up later in favor of another person. At heart, we are all a bit selfish, we want more time to devote to their development, business, leisure. Domestic chores are performed by smart devices, an active sex life is possible and can be without marriage, and entertainment for the bachelors is much more diverse than for the model family. Bachelor life is devoid of domestic cramps, reproaches and complaints about small things. It is full of freedom and comfort. Family values have advantages too, but the beauty of life is that everyone can choose for themselves what is more important to them at this stage.
Negative experiences in the past
Whether a person has been burned out in a failed marriage or has simply experienced the collapse of a long-term relationship, he or she is in no hurry to enter the same river again. And the fact that unmarried relationships have long been the norm allows one to change partners as often as one wants. No one condemns cohabitation anymore and young people of both sexes are much more comfortable living in such a “demo” marriage and looking out for each other for years. Why rush to get married if you are happy with everything.
The inability to build a relationship
When marriages were arranged by the older generation, young people had no need to make any effort. “Guys and girls have been going down the aisle for centuries. Now we choose our own partner and it is not easy at all. Especially if you only choose one and for life. You have to charm the girl, interest her, build a relationship of trust with her before you can talk about something serious. Many do not know how to flirt from the word “at all”, do not know how to maintain a conversation with the opposite sex, and are not willing to learn.
Being fixated on your career doesn’t leave much time for a personal life. Today, there are a million spheres for development, and thanks to the internet, we have the opportunity to work on our own schedule. But the consequence is that the boundaries between personal and work time have become almost blurred. Modern men work 24 hours a day and don’t even have time to rest, when to find time to build a relationship with the opposite sex. They put it off until the future, which never comes, because work never ends.
Not wanting to get married can be for many reasons, both valid and incomprehensible even to yourself. Bad experiences, upbringing, lifestyles and thoughts all influence attitudes towards marriage. But it is important to understand whether you do not want to get married at this point in life, to get married in general, or this girl you do not see as your wife? And based on the situation you can either work on yourself or live your life for fun and not make excuses to anyone. After all, your life only belongs to you.
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