See if there are any of them … you
In friendship, in love, at work, in society, toxic people are everywhere. And, as you know, we are our environment. Toxic people are a source of conflict, they cause stress, affect mood, self-esteem, our worldview. To avoid them, you need to recognize them.
10 TYPES OF TOXIC PEOPLE TO AVOID:
An egocentric person is a toxic person who can be detected without much effort. Being in a relationship with a self-centered person makes you feel completely alone. The egocentric speaks only about himself (and even bad things) and lives only for his own interests. He will not appreciate you, will not be interested in you. He really is not interested in you, he is only there because he sees in you a tool that he uses to increase his self-confidence. And not because he loves or cherishes you. Do you need such friends or relationships?
An envious person is an eternally dissatisfied person who can have everything, but he will always have little. Instead of focusing on their own lives and their little pleasures, the envious daydream about the lives of others. He has everything, but he still wants more. He is good, but others always do better than him. Spending too much time with an envious person means seeing life from the wrong side, since he simplifies and devalues all achievements.
The type that complicates everything, twists, dramatizes. He is the one who will analyze your quarrel to the smallest detail; often it only happens in his head and for only one purpose – to make you feel bad. It is said that the distortion of perception in such individuals is due to the fact that they feel satisfactory only if their relatives feel bad. By making others unhappy, he himself becomes calmer and happier.
MOCKER / CRITIC
“Yes, I was joking,” is the joker’s favorite phrase in response to your offense. The mocker is not just a lover of barbs. He or she takes pleasure in the misfortune of others: he likes to scrutinize, ask too many tactless questions, repeat things that are unpleasant to you in order to cause discomfort or tension between several people. There is a difference between those who give honest feedback and those who criticize. Feedback is very important, it can help you see your weaknesses and start working on them. But toxic people criticize absolutely every action you take. And this is especially dangerous – you will believe their words, and your self-esteem will suffer.
The capricious type is an adult child who can push anyone to the limit. Everyone should adapt to her / his desires, no matter if they like it or not. If he or she only likes pubs, he won’t rest until you find a suitable one instead of sitting down at the nearest restaurant. Uncontrollable whims make you feel uncomfortable. The cranky usually takes his frustrations out on you and can quickly become unbearable in everyday life. Don’t even try to educate or understand him, just run.
It all starts the same way: at first you empathize and try to help, you are considerate and kind to the victim. Then comes the phase of nervousness: the victim does not like anything, she is pessimistic and relieves herself of all responsibility, because everyone around is against her, everyone is to blame except herself, and all problems become insurmountable in her eyes. Then the victim takes your help for granted and treats you like an eternal “vest”, no matter if she needs extra “ears” at 12 o’clock at night or money before payday. The victim always has difficult times, she sees enemies in everything and everyone, and not a challenge that gives invaluable experience. The victim always chooses to suffer and wants you to also plunge into her abyss with her.
If the dramatizer can be forgiven, because his actions can be caused by self-doubt, then the manipulator rarely forgets about his actions. The manipulator uses and abuses you by pretending to be your friend/partner in order to force you to do what is beneficial for them by any means. Your weaknesses, your strengths, what you adore and what annoys you… He knows everything about you to take advantage of it. Because the manipulator always has a goal. It can be career advancement, a thirst for universal love, or he just likes to feel the strings in his hands that he can pull, feeling like a puppeteer. The manipulator will try to get to know you better, because the easier it will be for him to manage. Unfortunately, there are several types of manipulators, including perverse narcissists, that is, psychopaths. So if you don’t once a person is caught even in an insignificant lie, run without looking back. Who knows what else he’s capable of.
The judge always knows best. Instead of appreciating people and the present moment, the judge makes categorical judgments about everything, even the most insignificant things. This is enough to sow a seed of doubt in you. Thus, the judge becomes your moral advisor, who focuses on the shortcomings – yours or someone else’s, forgetting about other qualities. But people, like everything in life, are not divided into good and bad. And every action always has a reason. With a judge, it is important to remain yourself and not change your principles. Then they will leave you alone.
An arrogant person may just be rude. But it’s still very often toxic. It is important to remember that the less self-confidence a person has, the more he worries about how he looks in the eyes of others. In order not to let such a person upset you and not pay attention to his barbs, just keep in mind that an arrogant person can play rude precisely in order to hide his insecurity and insecurity.
Pessimistic, grumpy, always nervous and suspicious … Surrounding yourself with such demotivators is the best way to develop insecurity and fears in yourself, to see the glass always half empty and plunge into complete despair. Negativity is contagious, and this Dementor can even drag you into depression if he is around at a moment when you are especially weak and vulnerable.
How to get rid of a toxic person?
The most effective way is to emotionally withdraw. It’s not that hard. Once we have identified a toxic person at work, in a relationship, or in a circle of friends, it is already easy for us to predict their behavior and reactions. The idea is to stay in control when they try to get you emotional. The more overreacting you are, the more you will attract the toxic person. Set distance and boundaries. And remember – to live well, you need to be less upset.